Good Wood (movie review)

Last night I watched the movie Ed Wood, and I have to give it high marks. It wasn't at all what I expected - I thought I was throwing in a comedy, but this could just as easily be categorized under Drama.

The back of the box says the movie is supposed to be about Ed Wood, Hollywood's worst director of all time. Really it seems to be more about the original Dracula, Bela Lugosi, played by Martin Landau. Landau won an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor with this performance, and deservedly so. His story takes up probably 3/4 of the film, and it isn't until Legosi dies that it really feels like a story about Ed Wood. That wasn't a spoiler, by the way. Legosi is introduced in the film trying out coffins and tells Wood that he'll die soon.

Landau beautifully depicts the the aging actor's comedic and tragic lifestyle. Legosi is bitter, lonely, and pathetic. He only wants to make another film, but in joining a low-budget venture his unemployment ends and he can no longer pay the rent or feed his morphine addiction. In one chilling scene he's screaming in a rehab clinic, in another scene he's declaring, "Let's shoot this fucker!" before jumping in a lake to wrestle a giant plastic octopus.

The rest of the film (the first 15 minutes and last half hour) is less dramatic, more comedic and more about Ed Wood. I really like Wood's character, played by Johnny Depp. He has a "Gee-Golly, Aw Shucks" persona, and a great attitude about his film-making passion. He sees the star potential in everyone, from the washed-up Legosi to a heavyweight wrestler to his girlfriend's chiropracter. I really love his love for film. It reminds me that even bad movies can be good or hold special meaning. Also, he cross-dresses, and it's funny seeing Johnny Depp in a blond wig.

The whole movie is in black-and-white and is so ridiculous that I felt many times like I was watching MST3K, except without the robots sitting in the corner of the screen making comments- I wonder if MST3K has done any of Ed Wood's actual films. He's supposedly the worst director of all time, so probably.

The film does drag in spots, but there's plenty of fun concepts that make the film worth viewing. Johnny Depp tries to raise money for his film "Graverobbers from Outer Space" by shmoozing a Baptist who wants to make movies about the 12 apostles. Sarah Jessica Parker's character gets a bad play review and exclaims, "Do I really have a face like a horse?" Also, if there are any Scrubs fans out there, THIS is where the "Dr. Acula" joke came from.

Ed Wood is a Tim Burton film, and if you like Tim Burton films you should like this- it really is a combination of Big Fish and Mars Attacks. 4 stars.

Cereal Aisle

I was at the grocery store the other day. Needed mayo for my sammich. I like the grocery store, especially the cereal aisle. Read my book and you'll know why.

It appears Lucky Charms has introduced yet another new marshmallow- the Hourglass. Why is this a lucky charm? Have you ever had a really good string of luck and had someone say, "Wow, you must have an hourglass or something!" No.

Come to think of it, I've never heard that said about red balloons either. They should remove the balloons and hourglasses from Lucky Charms. The red balloons they could use to make a no-nutrition/all-marshmallow cereal called 99 Red Balloons.

I actually remember back to when I was like 4 years old, watching morning cartoons and seeing when the purple horseshoe was first introduced to Lucky Charms. I didn't witness the moon landing, but I witnissed this. Anyway, the horseshoe is a legit lucky charm. As is the four-leaf clover.

Things like hearts, stars and moons I can go either way on. Those I wouldn't necessarily consider charms, but I can at least see the argument with the idea of luck tied in with astrology or being lucky with love. They should take all the stars and moons and stuff and invent Pagan Charms cereal. "They're always after me Pagan Charms!"

I also remember when they had yellow moons and blue diamonds, which merged to form blue moons. I think they should make a Lucky Charms Vegas-style. They have hearts and clovers (clubs), could bring back the diamonds, and add spades. Perfect. They could also have other Lucky Vegas Charms like an ace up the sleeve, dice, lucky sevens, etc.

What's in a name? Part 2

Just a quick post for the heck of it. Last night I was sitting at Biff's, enjoying a well-deserved brew with my team after our come from behind victory. We decided everyone needed nicknames, and came up with some solid ones. I'm still "Little B" (or LB, or something along those lines), but we christened the rest of the team with names like Doc, Chief, Stacks, Abacus, The Firm, Ball, Chain, Slut aka Nun aka Cloister, The Assassin, and Midnight Cowboy (or Tex or something). What an awesome team.

Anyway, I happen to be going to the Twins game on Friday and I just now checked out the scheduled pitching matchup. Pitching for Arizona: Randy Johnson. Also known as: "The Big Unit."

I'm pretty stoked. I've always been a fan of Randy Johnson. Here's why he rules:

He's like 9 feet tall, has a mullet and is ugly as sin.

He once threw a fastball that hit a bird flying by and the bird exploded. Not that killing birds is cool or anything, but Holy Crap! It exploded!

185 beaned batters in his career.

And ... he's The Big Unit! How could you NOT have a good time cheering/heckling this guy?

What's in a name?

I've been super busy at work lately, so haven't hit up the ol' blog in a while. But I just finished up with a big project and I'm taking tomorrow off (my first full day off since January!), so I'm back to "sneak through the work day without actually working" mode. Sweet. I'm going to drive over to Milwaukee to see my sister and brother-in-law, and catch a Twins/Brewers game. I hope for fun times.

I usually pick up some new music for the road trip, so tonight I'm going to pick up the Foxboro Hot Tubs "Stop, Drop and Roll." This is actually just the new Green Day cd, but for some reason they decided to go under a different name for this release. I usually keep my music all in order, so for cataloguing purposes these things can be a bit annoying (Side note: does anyone have Ben Folds Five under the "Bs" and Ben Folds under the "Fs"?).

I've noticed that a lot of bands and musicians do the name change/pseudonym thing. Just a few that I know of: Foxboro Hot Tubs = Green Day, Prince = that love symbol thing, Box Car Racer = Blink 182, Fort Minor = Linkin Park, Chris Gaines = Garth Brooks, Chuck Norris = Walker, Texas Ranger.

I don't know. I have to imagine that the same Hot Tubs cd would sell much better under the Green Day name, but whatever. I guess I shouldn't point fingers. I've changed my Blog's name about a dozen times, and I'm known in most frisbee circles as "Little B." Feel free to post your thoughts or comment on your favorite altered-ego bands.