I saw The Golden Compass with the fam over the weekend. Wow, what a terrible film! Good books don't always make good films, but this was just awful. Gandalf and Saruman of L.O.R. wizarding fame reunited. I guess they thought if they took actors from a good book-turned-movie that they'd find success. Gandalf/Ian McKellen supplied the voice of Iorek the bear, and Saruman/Christopher Lee plays "guy who sat in shadows for a minute and said something ominoius." I don't even know why he was in this film, and can't remember the ominous thing he said. I'm sure it had nothing to do with anything.
I knew I had seen the witch somewhere before. The witches in the movie, like pretty much everything else in the movie, weren't explained at all. They just kinda show up and everyone's like, "Uh, witches... great." And then they shoot arrows and there's some gold spraklers. Anyway, the witch is Eva Green, who played the last Bond chick in Casino Royale, the movie with Daniel Craig who plays Lord Asriel in Golden Compass. WTF? Let's get a bunch of characters from the Lord of the Rings and James Bond movies to make a crappy movie.
My favorite things about the movie: One was when these two golden bug things are spying on the heroes and one of them gets captured and sealed in a round tin while the other bug-spy device flies away. An old wise gypsy is like, "Well, we caught this one, but that other one is still out there and could put all our lives in terrible, terrible danger!" And that's the last we hear of the bug that got away. It got away! We're all doomed! Or not. My other favorite thing was that the movie just sort of ends. It stops with about 4 chapters left in the book and I was pretty thankful because at that point I just wanted to go home like the character Roger, who is saved and then takes a nap. Hooray! Good thing nothing bad happens to him! (This is sarcasm that anyone who has read the book and seen the movie can identify with).
When the credits started rolling I stood up and said to my sister, "That was terrible," and some woman sitting behind us retorted, "I LIKED IT!" Okay, Great! Thanks, random stranger.
If anyone wants to chat more about the book and/or film, feel free to comment. My fish have grown, by the way. I'll document that soon.
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